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And I can’t help but wonder … will they ever know it was me?
Suddenly, Dixie pauses and turns her head straight toward me.
Our eyes connect. Just one look says more than a thousand words ever could. Pure and utter hatred.
I don’t know what made her turn her head because I didn’t make a sound. She couldn’t have known I was still here.
Maybe it was instinct. Maybe it was fate.
But now she knows.
I was here when it happened.
I’m not waiting around until she calls out my name, so I quickly jump off the fence.
Fuck that Zippo. I’m not going back there to fetch it and incriminate myself in the process. No fucking way.
I hope Dixie doesn’t tell the world it was my fault.
God … I fucking hope she forgets she ever saw me here.
* * *
Dixie
Past
November 6th
I grab buckets and fill them with water at the nearest outlet outside. I keep running back and forth, chucking the water onto the fire, but it’s not nearly enough to stop the flames from consuming the farmhouse.
My dad and brothers are fighting the flames with a half-broken hose, but the water doesn’t spray out fast enough to put out the fire. Even Mom comes running out of the house, ready to help. By the time we’ve managed to douse the flames, nothing’s left of the farmhouse. Nothing but broken down, blackened wood, soot, and … potted plants.
I stare in shock at the scene in front of me.
“It’s gone. All of it,” Dad growls, kicking away a piece of wood. “Fuck!”
I never hear him swear this loudly. Something important must’ve been inside that farmhouse. What the fuck were they hiding in there that I wasn’t allowed to see?
Then it hits me.
The potted plants, the nightly visits, the stern look on my dad’s face, family first.
He’s been waving it right in front of me, and I didn’t even notice.
They’re growing something illegal in here.
Drugs.
“Dad,” I mutter, throwing the last bucket of water on the smoldering pile of rubble.
“Not now,” he growls, passing me.
I follow him. “Dad!” I won’t let him ignore me. Not this time.
He swiftly spins on his heels. “What?” he sputters in my face.
“Were you growing drugs in there?” I ask, frowning.
He immediately turns around again, mumbling, “That’s none of your business.”
“Yes, it is.” I tug his arm. “Dad. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you weren’t ready yet,” he replies, sighing out loud.
Not ready yet? For what? Knowing they were doing something illegal? Or participating in their scheme?
“Were you ever planning to tell me?” I ask, licking my lips.
He goes to his knees in front of a single plant and pulls it from the rubble, almost caressing it in his hands. “Once you were old enough. Once I was sure you’d be able to handle it.”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Your morals, Dixie. They get in the way,” he says, and he gets to his feet and takes the plant to Danny. “Put this one in a pot immediately. Get it some water.”
“Dad,” I mumble, tagging along. I’m stunned. Completely flabbergasted at what I’ve just discovered. My dad and brothers were secretly growing drugs in here.
“Tell me why, please,” I say.
“What’s there to tell?” he replies, immediately directing his attention toward Ben. “Go see if you can salvage any more of the plants.”
Ben nods and leaves us alone.
“Is the farm not enough?” I ask.
“No. Yes … but not for me. Not for us,” he says, pointing at me. “I wanted more for you. More for your brothers.”
“I never asked for more,” I say, making a face.
“I don’t need you to ask for anything,” he replies. “That is what family means. You take care of your family. You give them everything you have. Blood. Sweat. Tears.” He plucks another half-dead plant from the ground and dusts it off. “This is how I take care of my family.”
I swallow away the lump in my throat. It’s the first time in years that he actually admitted to caring for us and wanting the best for us. Even if it means sacrificing what’s good. I guess that’s the only way my dad knows how to do things. All or nothing. Do or die.
I can only admire his tenacity although I know it’s morally wrong according to society. But the world isn’t black and white. Not everything is right or wrong. There’s nuance, a middle ground.
And I can appreciate that he finally told me the truth. Even if it’s a little too late.
“So are you gonna help us clean up?” Dad asks.
I nod and pick up a pot and a half-burned plant from the ground.
It’s the first of many to come. As my dad always says … family first.
I don’t feel guilty. Far from it.
In fact, the only thing I feel right now is anger.
Because on the ground next to the burned down potted plant, near the edge of the farmhouse, I find a Zippo lighter.
I’m pretty sure I know how this fire started.
Brandon Locklear.
Chapter Twenty-One
Brandon
Present
That was the night my whole life changed … but hers too.
We both lost something that night. Part of our soul. Our innocence.
And why? Because of fucking drugs.
And now I’m finding out my uncle bought them from the Burrells too? This can’t be true, can it?
I frown. “Why would he …? Fuck. Of course, the hotel.”
“His guests probably pay double if not triple the price we ask,” Dixie says, voicing my exact thoughts. “So now you know.” She turns her head and gazes at the window even though the curtains prevent her from seeing out.
I never knew my uncle did that. Then again, I shouldn’t be surprised, considering his line of business, and that horrible thing he made me do to the Burrell twins.
“We were just trying to make a livin’ all right?” she suddenly adds with tears in her eyes. “Who are you to judge?”
I shake my head. “I’m not.”
“Of course you aren’t,” she says, but I’m more surprised by the fact that she cares about what I think.
I grab her chin and make her look at me. “I don’t care what you and your dad do.”
She swats my hand away, and says, “I know you don’t. That’s the whole reason the farmhouse burned down in the first place.”
Reminding me of what I did is a bitter pill to swallow. I won’t pretend I was a knight in shining armor. I said and did some horrible things to her, and nothing will ever change that.
Nothing.
* * *
Dixie
“That night never should’ve happened,” he says, licking his lips. “In fact … we should’ve never happened. I wish I’d never set my eyes on you in the first place. Wish you never spoke to me with that sweet, sinful voice of yours. Wish I never got to kiss those dirty lips of yours.”
My breath hitches in my throat.
Sweet, sinful voice? He’s never said that. And why are my cheeks suddenly heating? Fuck.
“Is that what you want me to say?” he adds.
“Sweet, sinful voice?” I say, raising a brow, trying not to sound sheepish.
His lip twitches to almost form a grin. Almost, but not quite. “You know what I mean.”
“Oh, please elaborate,” I muse, cocking my head.
For some reason, our bodies are closer than we were a few minutes ago. It’s as though we’re hovering toward each other even though we both know better than to repeat that mistake.
Suddenly, his phone rings, breaking the spell.
He leans back, clears his throat, and then snatches his cell phone off the counter. His fingers hover over the green button to accept the
call. All he needs to do is push.
But he doesn’t.
Instead, he waits until the call ends. Then he goes into his contacts, blocks the number, and throws the phone back onto the counter. The name at the top clearly said Josiah.
“Your uncle?” I ask.
He nods but doesn’t say anything. Words aren’t necessary.
He’s saying all he needs to by doing what he just did. By going against his uncle’s wishes to capture me, he signed his own death warrant. We both know it, but he doesn’t seem fazed. In fact, he seems more sure than ever of his decision.
Is this because I told him about the drugs and that his uncle did business with us?
Or because he wants to keep me to himself?
I shudder at the thought of everything he could do to me. And how my body tingles at the thought. Fuck.
No.
Not happening.
He’s the reason your brothers are dead.
I close my eyes and tell myself to get a grip. He got away with a crime, and he should pay for it in blood. Just like his uncle, who ruined our business by not paying for the drugs he got.
But I know he wants me to pay too. He believes I ruined his life. That’s why he came to destroy mine. It’s not fair, but I’m not in a position to go at him right now.
I’m not the one with a gun. He is.
And I’m sure he’d use it to hurt me if he had to.
If it meant I’d do exactly what he wanted.
Brandon has proven he doesn’t back down from a fight, so I can’t risk it. But maybe, just maybe, I can change my fate and force his hand by taking advantage of the situation.
By using his only weakness against him.
And I know exactly what that is.
Me.
I reach for him, placing one hand on his shoulder while the other carefully trails up his chest. “So what are we gonna do now?”
“We?” he repeats with a gruff voice.
“I know you wanna,” I say, smiling coyly. I’ve seen it with my own eyes in that shower. He can’t hide that he had a hard-on right after talking to me … and that he jerked off.
God, I can still see the cum shooting from his cock. That was a sight to behold. Big too. I never imagined I’d witness that … and especially not from him.
I swallow, and his eyes follow down my throat. I feel watched. As if he knows exactly what I’m thinking. I hope not. I don’t want him to know I’m planning to take his gun when we’re tumbling on the bed.
“You’re wrong,” he says with a harsh voice and a stoic face.
“Lie,” I say, licking my lips. Now his eyes follow my tongue. “See?”
He swats away my hand when I get to his face. “Don’t.”
“What? Touch you?”
“Pretend you actually wanna.”
He’s right. I don’t. I shouldn’t. Or at least, that’s what I’m trying to tell myself as the picture of his naked body lingers in my mind. Shit.
“Who says I don’t?” I say, shrugging. “You don’t know that.”
“You hate me,” he says, narrowing his eyes.
I do, actually. I hate his guts. More than anything, I wish him dead for what he did to my brothers.
But he’s my only way out of this mess too.
“So?” I smirk. “Who says people need to love each other to fuck?” When I attempt to come close again, he shoves me away.
“I said no,” he says with an even angrier voice than before. I think I’m getting close. He’s about to burst.
“Or what?” I reply. “You’ll hurt me?”
I’m not afraid. He can’t kill me. He tried and failed.
Suddenly, he grabs my wrist midair, his grip rough and painful. “Don’t try me,” he says.
I’m not gonna back down. This is my only shot at freedom. And now that he stopped answering his uncle, it’s the perfect time to start.
But that flicker of excitement in his eyes … damn. It makes my heart pump faster.
* * *
Brandon
She’s getting on my nerves. So much so that I just wanna tie her to the bed at this point. Maybe strip her of some clothes and see how far we get until she begs me to stop.
I don’t think she means it. She’s only saying it to get me to let her go. Does she really think I won’t notice? I’m not that stupid.
Despite her alluring body and scent pulling me in, I know better than to play with fire. And she sure is a blazing one. Smart too. She knows how to turn something into an advantage, but I can’t let it happen.
She needs to pay for her crimes.
I won’t forgive her for ruining my life, and I won’t forgive her for trying to kill me and my uncle with a fucking bomb either.
But fuck me, she’s so damn hard to resist.
“Don’t you want … a taste?” she murmurs, inching closer and closer with those beautiful puckered lips of hers.
“Stop. I won’t say it again,” I growl.
She pouts. “Why else are you keeping me here? You just canceled a call from your uncle, so it can’t be that.”
I’m still thinking about it. I haven’t decided yet. I know I’m gonna punish her … I just don’t know how.
My uncle would be the easy way out.
I’m not letting him have that honor, and I’m not letting her off the hook either.
Besides, if what she’s saying is true, he didn’t own up to his end of the deal, which means he was liable to damage. If he bought her family’s whole supply and that was their main source of income, no wonder she took extreme measures. I would’ve probably done the same thing if he wasn’t my uncle.
But that’s just it. He is my uncle, and I owe my life to him right now.
Which is why I’m in such a difficult position.
And I made it worse by not answering the phone.
I take a deep breath as I snatch my phone from the counter and stare at my uncle’s number again, wondering if I should call him back. If I made a huge mistake by stopping him from coming after her. If I’m betraying the only family I have left.
“Don’t,” she suddenly says, wrapping her arms around my neck. “He’ll take me away from you. He’ll kill me. And he’ll kill you for going against him.”
Rage bubbles to the surface, and I lash out by grasping both her arms and dragging her toward the bed, shoving her down.
“Don’t. Fucking. Touch. Me.” I mean it this time, and I think she finally understands because her mouth closes and she scrunches up the blankets with her fingers.
Good. I want her to know I’m not playing around.
I’m the one who decides her fate. Not her. Not my uncle.
Me.
“You wanna toy with my emotions?” I growl.
She shakes her head, but the moment she parts her lips, I pull my gun out again and point it at her pussy. “Do you want me to hurt you?”
“No,” she instantly says. “Please.”
“Please?” I repeat, my brows drawing together. “A minute ago, you were begging me to.”
“Not there,” she says, crossing her legs.
I part them with my knees.
I know what her weakness is.
She thinks I’ll kill her quickly? Wrong.
I’ll take my sweet ass time. I’ll do whatever I want to her body until she begs me to end it. That’ll teach her.
“You think you can seduce me?” I say, pushing the gun against her clothes right where her pussy is. “Don’t lie.”
“I’ll stop,” she says, trying to cover it with her hands.
“Nuh-uh,” I say, nudging them off.
Her eyes fill with tears. “If you’re gonna kill me, just do it.”
“Who says I will? Maybe I’ll enjoy our time together first,” I reply, licking my lips at the thought. She wants to play the victim, be my guest, but I’m the last to believe it. I’m not the only one who deserves the worst, and she knows it.
“So … you think you can watch me in the shower
without repercussions?” I mumble.
“It was an accident,” she says.
“Of course, it was.” I snort. It’s a damn lie, and she knows it. “If I shoot you in the leg now, that’s an accident too, right?”
“No, no,” she begs. “Do anything you want, just don’t hurt me.”
“Anything?” My cock hardens just from the thought. “Tell me you want it,” I hiss, nudging the gun against her thighs.
“I want it,” she coos.
I’ll give her a piece of her own medicine. “Make me believe it.”
“Give it to me,” she begs.
“Look me in the eyes when you say it, Dixie,” I growl, grabbing her hair as I tilt her head up.
When she opens them and shows me those beautiful, tear-stained eyes, I remember why I fell for her in the first place. Fuck me, she’s pretty when she’s mad.
“Give it to me. I want it,” she repeats in a thick, seductive voice that makes me want to fuck her right now.
Maybe I will, just to show her who’s boss.
She can’t play me, but I will play her.
As a grin spreads on my lips, I say, “Good. Now open your mouth.”
When she does, I put the tip of the gun inside, right on her tongue.
“Suck.”
Her eyes widen as she looks up at me, confused.
“Didn’t hear me? Suck,” I command, this time louder.
She immediately starts licking the metal, sucking on it as if it’s her last lifeline. It probably is, considering how close I came to actually pulling the trigger.
But I won’t tell her that. I like keeping her in the dark.
She deserves to be there, just like me.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Dixie
With the metal stuck in my mouth, I start sucking. Right now, the gun is positioned in a way that I’ll probably survive. Or not. Just thinking about that possibility makes my skin crawl.
But he hasn’t clicked off the safety, so this is all to taunt me. Right? That’s what I tell myself anyway while I suck the metal like it’s his dick.
I can’t believe he’s making me do this. I’m convinced he won’t shoot me. He’s only doing this to punish me and humiliate me.